Cut Cleanly
Poetry by Amanda Hiland
Cut!
Cut cleanly!
are the words they say my mother screamed
as I struggled inside her,
tangled and turned wrongly
away from the life that lay
beyond the white cliffs of her thighs.
They told her they had to cut
her belly open, and I can’t imagine
how much fear spilled out with the blood
as they slashed their way through and
lifted me from her, drenched in
that agony. Then she fell into shock and her heart
withered to my firstborn cries.
It was a clean cut, they said--
it should not have killed her.
How else could it have been?
She knows I have no choice but life. In my dreams,
I still cut myself free of her body and
rise as through water,
a cleaner cut each time.
Cut cleanly!
are the words they say my mother screamed
as I struggled inside her,
tangled and turned wrongly
away from the life that lay
beyond the white cliffs of her thighs.
They told her they had to cut
her belly open, and I can’t imagine
how much fear spilled out with the blood
as they slashed their way through and
lifted me from her, drenched in
that agony. Then she fell into shock and her heart
withered to my firstborn cries.
It was a clean cut, they said--
it should not have killed her.
How else could it have been?
She knows I have no choice but life. In my dreams,
I still cut myself free of her body and
rise as through water,
a cleaner cut each time.
About the Writer
Amanda Hiland grew up hiking through the forests of the Pacific Northwest. She is very fond of the ocean, colorful pens, and chai tea. She teaches Special Education by day and is a major astronomy enthusiast at night. Her poems have appeared in Epiphany, Cathexis, Passengers, West Trade Review, Topology Magazine, New Plains Review, Timberline Review, and various other publications. Find her on Facebook.